From Bullied Professor to Inspired Business Owner with Lorraine Segal
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Lorraine Segal, Conflict Remedy.
Lorraine Segal is a conflict management expert who helps leaders in organizations navigate conflict and promote harmonious and productive relationships. Through her business, Conflict Remedy, she offers coaching, training, and consulting as well as writing a blog. She teaches at Sonoma State University, leading the Conflict Management Certificate program. She has been named one of the top 30 experts in conflict management to follow on LinkedIn.
Can you tell our readers about your background?
After working at a battered women’s shelter, at a food coop, as a research interviewer, and as an office temp, I wanted to do more with my life and went back to school to get a Master’s degree in Teaching English as a Second language. After I graduated, and worked seven years as a freeway flyer/adjunct faculty, piecing together a schedule at a number of schools, I became a tenured professor at a community college, teaching and running the department for twenty years.
What inspired you to start your business?
Although I loved my students at the community college and had leadership opportunities that many women never get, the campus climate was toxic and hostile to change and change agents like myself. I was bullied and mobbed and ended up with PTSD. I started praying and doing the footwork, to find a different career, and to get myself out of there! In part, because I saw conflict and disagreements dreadfully mishandled at the college, I was drawn to conflict resolution. I found a program, and with my first class, I fell in love with the field. I got a certificate, and also trained as a mediator and conflict management coach. Although I wasn’t a natural entrepreneur and had never dreamed of having my own business, I quickly realized that there were virtually no full-time jobs available in my new field. Since doing this work was my heart’s desire, I began to educate myself and get help to learn how to start and run a successful business.
Where is your business based?
My business is based in Santa Rosa California, but I have been doing most of my coaching, consulting, and teaching via Zoom. So I have clients now all over the world.
How did you start your business? What were the first steps you took?
First, I started talking to people I knew who had their own businesses and found groups and teachers who could help me. Then, I:
· Set up a separate bank account for my business and separate spreadsheets to have clarity about my finances.
· Got help creating a website and starting to write a blog.
· Joined Facebook.
· Started exploring different networking groups.
· Began taking business development and marketing classes.
What has been the most effective way of raising awareness for your business?
This is still a question I keep asking myself! I have tried so many ways to network and market, and I haven’t found one action I can keep repeating or one organization to belong to that always works. That being said, I keep getting more clients. And, there are some things I do keep doing that I believe help.
· I have a website and consistently write a blog post and send out a newsletter each month on topics related to my business. I ask all my clients and students to join my newsletter list. I have gotten a number of clients that way, either people who have found my website or blog or have received my newsletter.
· I have a robust presence on LinkedIn and some on Facebook.
· I go to (now virtual) networking events. Most are a bust, but I have met some interesting people and gotten teaching engagements and clients that way.
· I have joined organizations, like HR-related for example, where I may find potential clients.
· I have looked for podcasts or blog posts I can be a guest on.
· I have done short free or low-cost presentations to groups.
· I remember that I am not in charge of outcomes, only footwork. I see everything I do as planting seeds for the future and let go of an urgent need for immediate success.
What have been your biggest challenges and how did you overcome them?
Running my own business, I’ve had many challenges.
Lack of knowledge:
I have worked hard to educate myself about all the elements of having and running a business that I previously knew nothing about. Determination, persistence, and patience with myself and the process have all helped.
Fear of failure (and success):
I used to judge myself harshly and think only perfection and overwork were good enough. I made myself seriously ill twice before I began to see work/life balance as essential. I also felt afraid of being visible, of making a name for myself, feeling, like many women, that it wasn’t safe. My joy at doing the work and being of service, knowing that greater visibility meant more people I could help, steadied me and made me more willing.
Fears around money and charging a good rate for my services.
I would choke every time I had to set a fee or ask for money. I had to do some deep inner work to uncover unhealthy attitudes about money I had absorbed from my parents and society about money and spirituality being incompatible, that “nice girls” help people for free. I still struggle with that at times, although I’ve gotten much better.
How do you stay focused?
I set yearly goals, monthly goals, weekly goals, and daily goals in a special notebook. And I really follow them, imperfectly. The last thing I do each day for my business is to get clear what appointments and other commitments I have for the next day. Sunday evenings I do the same thing for the week. I make checkboxes for each task because I love checking them off!
Also, for my work/life balance, I check in with myself about how tired I am. If I’m tired and losing focus, unless it is urgent, I stop working for the day. And, I make time for exercise, meditation, and relaxation. I try to be a good boss to myself.
How do you differentiate your business from the competition?
Although there are many people in my field, I don’t know very many who have the same approach or do the combination of work that I do. I do my best to see people as colleagues rather than competitors. And, there is a lot of conflict in the world. Even if I worked flat out, I could only help with a small portion of it. So, I believe there is an abundance of clients. I just have to draw the right people to me.
What has been your most effective marketing strategy to grow your business?
I don’t really differentiate between raising awareness for my business, which I addressed earlier in this interview and marketing.
What's your best piece of advice for aspiring and new entrepreneurs?
Trust yourself and be curious. Do what you love, how you love to do it. Be patient and persistent.
What's your favorite app, blog, and book? Why?
It's a simple app, but I still love my iCal and how it syncs with my phone. I feel good about what I share in my own blog. I also really like Rick Hanson’s Just One Thing. If I have to pick just one, the book which helped me most with my business is Marianne Williamson’s The Divine Law of Compensation, On work, money, and miracles.
What's your favorite business tool or resource? Why?
Harvard Business Review has so many good articles that relate to my work. I keep subscribing, year after year.
Who is your business role model? Why?
I have been lucky enough to find a group of business owners who are visionary, kind, honest, and successful. They are my mentors and colleagues who inspire me to be better and do better.
How do you balance work and life?
With difficulty! I love my work so much that sometimes it is hard to set limits. But, I know I am my business’ most important resource, so I take my well-being seriously. I exercise, I eat well, and I laugh.
What’s your favorite way to decompress?
Taking a walk, reading fantasy or sci-fi novels, watching romantic comedies.
What do you have planned for the next six months?
I’ve been doing a lot of outreach. I have some steady clients and I have a couple of classes to plan. I have recently completed a memoir and have set a goal of getting it published this year. I am always awaiting what the universe has in store for me.
How can our readers connect with you?
Thanks for asking! My website and blog: https://ConflictRemedy.com You can sign up for my monthly newsletter there.
You can send me a direct message through the Contact page. https://conflictremedy.com/contact/
Sonoma State University Conflict Management certificate program:
http://seie.sonoma.edu/programs/conflict-management-certificate-program